


sirenum scopuli

by paradisedise



Category: NCT (Band)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Stripper/Exotic Dancer, Angst, Breathplay, Fluff and Smut, JaeYong - Freeform, M/M, Mention of attempted assault, Rough Sex, Smut, i guess lol
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-10-04
Updated: 2017-11-13
Packaged: 2019-01-08 22:09:32
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 6
Words: 12,225
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12263040
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/paradisedise/pseuds/paradisedise
Summary: Jaehyun couldn’t take his eyes off of him as he danced, the performer’s body moving gracefully on stage.  He was shrugging off the shirt slowly and there was glitter on the sharp cut of his collarbones, reflecting in the bright lights.  There was a shy look on his face and his cheeks were pink.  The way he moved was intoxicating, utterly arousing.





	1. 1

**Author's Note:**

> hey did you know i have no fuckin original ideas so i just reuse stupid shit that other ppl have already done? also im stupid jaeyong trash

Jaehyun was horribly uncomfortable. This was not the type of activity he usually participated in on a Friday night after work. He preferred having staying home and having a drink alone if he wasn’t being dragged to the bar by Ten. This was beyond the bar though, this was a filthy, trashy place that Jaehyun had no intention of ever going to, especially not on a chilly evening in early February. Fuck Ten for guilt tripping him into this. Cigarette smoke was thick in the air and the squeaky fake leather of the booth Jaehyun slid into was driving him crazy. The shoddy wood table was sticky and Jaehyun hardly wanted to touch his frosted mug of beer.

“Jesus, would you lighten up? You’re not a criminal for being here,” Ten hissed across the table, hardly audible over the din of the bar. “You need to learn how to have a little fun once in awhile.” 

“Fuck you, I know how to have fun. You know this isn’t my idea of it but you dragged me out here anyway.” 

“Whatever, the performance is going to start soon. Tonight’s show is supposed to be really good, it’s why we’re here,” Ten leaned back against the cushion, sipping his drink. Jaehyun crossed his arms and tried not to choke on the unclean air. There was no point in fighting Ten’s stubborn ass. He sat there pissed off until the music started and the chatter died down, all eyes turning to the platform in the bar. Ten had managed to snag them a table close to the front and they had a clear view of the stage. The instrumental sounded from the speakers overhead, and Jaehyun recognized the combination of notes immediately because fuck, it was one of his favorite songs. He loved blues and jazz, and he was already anxious to see the performance despite himself. 

The spotlights from above were dimmed by the smoke but they centered on the raised platform, the reverb of a female singer adding to the ambiance. A slim figure emerged from behind the curtain, stepping out onto the walkway and gripping onto the pole that reached from the ceiling to the floor. He was wearing fitted black pants, just a touch too tight and a loose white button up shirt half undone. His hair was a soft, peachy pink, and there was a leather o-ring choker snapped around his neck. He was breathtakingly gorgeous, even Jaehyun had to admit it. 

Jaehyun couldn’t take his eyes off of him as he danced, the performer’s body moving gracefully on stage. He was shrugging off the shirt slowly and there was glitter on the sharp cut of his collarbones, reflecting in the bright lights. There was a shy look on his face and his cheeks were pink. The way he moved was intoxicating, utterly arousing. 

 

“I told you you’d like it,” Ten whispered, leaning in with a smug look on his face. “You should see your face.” 

“Shut up,” Jaehyun bit, swatting Ten away. The performer’s shirt was completely off now, discarded on the stage, and Jaehyun didn’t think it was possible for him to be even more beautiful but he was wrong. The choker’s metal ring was glinting and his head was thrown back, showing the smooth column of his neck and Jaehyun had never wanted someone so badly in his life. Sweat was beading on his forehead from the hot stage lights and a drop rolled down his temple to tendons of his nape. Jaehyun’s mouth was watering and he felt like his clothes were increasingly uncomfortable. 

The performance continued and the dancer continued to undress himself coyly until the final notes of the song rang through the air and the lights went dim. “Worth it?” Ten smirked, and Jaehyun struggled to tear his eyes from the stage. Jaehyun could only nod. “Hold on, I’m going to get us more drinks.” 

Chatter in the club started back up and Jaehyun picked at his fingernail, mind still filled with what he had just seen. He wanted to watch again and again but he was determined not to make this a habit, to forget about what he saw and not think about it again. He wasn’t this type of guy, the type of guy to get off on watching a stripper. Ten came back to the table without drinks and instead reached out for Jaehyun’s hand. “Come with me for a second.” 

Ten led Jaehyun through the club, weaving in between people and heading straight to the back of the room. When they passed the bar Jaehyun started to panic. Ten had already forced him here, what else did he have in mind? Jaehyun tried to call to him, ask him where they were going, but Ten either couldn’t hear him over the thumping music or was just ignoring him. Probably the latter considering Ten had an infuriating tendency to get carried away sometimes. They passed through a curtain into a dim room with a couch and coffee table. “Ten, what the fuck is going on?” 

“Happy early birthday,” Ten said, an absolutely evil look on his face. He pushed Jaehyun down onto the couch and left him there, dumbfounded. “Your present will be out shortly.” 

Finding it hard to breathe, Jaehyun sunk into the couch, trying not to think about how dirty it could be. After a moment a door opened and Jaehyun’s mouth went dry when he saw who it was. The pink haired dancer from earlier was in the doorway, adjusting his cuffs and looking temptingly disheveled. “Are you the client?” he asked, his voice raspy. 

Jaehyun nodded, unable to find words. The dancer strode across the room, standing in front of Jaehyun who was trying to hide in the couch cushions. Jaehyun felt small, exposed even, under the dancer’s intense gaze. “What’s your name?” he asked, running a hand through his hair. It looked slightly coarse from the dye but soft nonetheless. 

“I’m Jaehyun.”

“And how old are you Jaehyun?” 

“Twenty-two,” his voice trembled. 

“Just a couple years younger than me. I’m Taeyong, by the way. Did you enjoy the show earlier?” 

“Yeah, yeah it was really good.” God, Jaehyun sounded so stupid. Here was this gorgeous, resplendent beauty in front of him and his dumbass could only stutter. “You were amazing.” 

“Thank you,” Taeyong sounded aloof, like he had heard it before. He was standing there, looking impatient and fiddling with his choker. Jaehyun watched him tug on the ring and admired Taeyong’s collarbones, the top two buttons of his shirt undone. “Should we get started?”

“Oh, um, yeah, that would be good,” Jaehyun said, it finally hitting him that he was going to get a lap dance from the most beautiful person he had ever seen. A chill raced up his spine when Taeyong began undoing the rest of his shirt, the lowlight of the room reflecting alluringly off of his skin. Jaehyun’s felt dizzy, like there was no way this could be happening. Taeyong slipped the rest of the shirt off shyly and Jaehyun was amazed at how innocent he could make himself look. His pants came off as well, leaving Taeyong in briefs. Jaehyun’s ears were ringing. 

Taeyong took a step closer, a small smile on his face. Jaehyun could feel his ears heating up, turning beet red. Taeyong had a ruddy blush on his face, like he had just been kissed thoroughly. Jaehyun wanted nothing more than to kiss him in that moment. Taeyong straddled his lap, resting his hands on Jaehyun’s shoulders and Jaehyun kept his arms glued to his sides despite every cell in his body screaming for him to touch Taeyong. Jaehyun had no idea what the etiquette was for a lap dance but he did not want to cross any boundaries. Taeyong leaned in until they were inches apart and Jaehyun held his breath--he could see Taeyong studying his lips, eyes curious. They made eye contact and Jaehyun felt a shiver run through him. 

Taeyong exhaled and leaned back, closing his eyes. He grinded down on Jaehyun’s lap out of nowhere and the younger couldn’t help but groan, the pressure heavenly. Jaehyun’s eyes fluttered shut and Taeyong pressed against him again. “Open your eyes, don’t you want to look at me?” Taeyong purred, bringing a hand to Jaehyun’s neck. Right as Jaehyun opened his eyes Taeyong crawled even closer and it felt strangely intimate. Jaehyun couldn’t help but wonder if this was how these things normally went. Taeyong brought both hands into Jaehyun’s hair and tugged, yanking his head back. Jaehyun yelped and Taeyong brushed his lips lightly against Jaehyun’s adam’s apple. Jaehyun couldn’t breathe, it felt too sensitive, too good, and Taeyong was driving him crazy. 

Taeyong started grinding against him in rhythm, both of them breathless and flushed. Their chests were pressed together and Jaehyun could feel the warmth of his skin through his shirt. Instead he wished their skin was touching, nothing in between them but heat and friction. Jaehyun wanted Taeyong to be his, his personal bundle of pleasure, and they had hardly gotten started. Taeyong kept his hands in Jaehyun’s hair and his lips on Jaehyun’s neck, travelling to his nape and behind his ear. His mouth was barely touching him but Jaehyun knew his labored exhales were leaving goosebumps in their wake. 

Taeyong grabbed Jaehyun’s shoulders and pushed him down onto his back, staying on his lap and anchoring his hands to Jaehyun’s firm chest. Their rhythm got slower, more drawn out, and Taeyong’s eyes were screwed shut. Jaehyun let himself believe that Taeyong, with his blissful expression and hair falling in his face, was enjoying this, that he was getting off too. The older fisted his hands in Jaehyun’s shirt, sweat beading on his forehead. Jaehyun was losing it, unable to keep his hands to himself as Taeyong sped up again and brought his hand up to touch the older’s choker. He hooked two fingers in the ring, took a risk, and pulled down. Taeyong’s eyes snapped open and he whimpered. Jaehyun swore it was the most incredible sound he had ever heard. The pressure in Jaehyun’s gut was building and he was so close, so close from just grinding like this fully clothed. Watching Taeyong lose it too spurred him on and he pulled on the choker again hoping to hear another lascivious sound from Taeyong. 

Taeyong stopped dead when Jaehyun tugged on the ring, eyes darkening. Jaehyun whined in protest but didn’t dare ask for more. Taeyong caught his breath and stood up and Jaehyun watched his chest rise and fall rapidly. Jaehyun was so close and he could tell Taeyong was too, so why did he stop? He sat up, watching Taeyong slip his clothes back on, relishing the last glimpses of skin he could catch. 

“That was so good, holy shit,” Jaehyun mumbled, unable to think straight. He sat up, trying to control his breathing and digging his nails into his palms.

“Yeah, that was--” Taeyong stopped, like he was trying to think of the right thing to say. “Come see me again sometime.” 

Like that he was out the door, leaving Jaehyun dumbfounded on the couch.


	2. 2

Ten teased Jaehyun mercilessly when he asked if they could go back to the club the next weekend. Jaehyun couldn’t bring himself to be embarrassed though, not when when every other thought revolved around rose colored hair and ruddy, flushed cheeks. He hated himself for spending most of his evenings after their encounter gasping and spilling into his hand while imagining Taeyong and his pretty pink mouth. When Friday night rolled around and Ten and Jaehyun arrived at the club, Jaehyun hastily sat down at a table close to the stage. “I’ve never seen you so desperate. You haven’t even told me all the details of your birthday present but it must have been incredible.” 

Jaehyun chose to ignore Ten and nursed his drink, waiting for the lights to dim and focus on the stage. His heart was beating with vehemence, anticipation dissolving his patience. The room was getting crowded and Jaehyun knew it was for Taeyong. Everyone loved him, adored him, lusted after him. Jaehyun was nothing special, just another client. He had to remember that. A slow, sensual melody started to play over the speakers and low red lights shifted to the stage. It was a different song from last week, something with a heavier bass, newer. That meant it was probably a different outfit, different routine, and Jaehyun heart thrummed with expectation. Taeyong appeared on the stage, barely visible in the darkness. He stepped forward out onto the runway and Jaehyun held his breath. He was in a big white t-shirt, and loose sweatpants, hair tousled like he had just rolled out of bed. Jaehyun was letting his mind go somewhere dangerous, somewhere too personal. Taeyong looked so delectable, so fuckable, and Jaehyun was thinking about what he would look like in his own bed. How their bodies would fit in a shared space, what Taeyong looked like when he was sleeping, how he would look wearing Jaehyun’s clothes. It was dangerous, and Jaehyun knew this is exactly what the show was about. Taeyong was supposed to look tempting, like he wanted people to imagine owning him, and Jaehyun was falling hard for it. 

Taeyong had a timid look on his face, perfectly selling the part of innocence, reality. He slipped off his pants and underneath were black thigh-high stockings, lace lining the top. His legs were slim and looked extra long from the angle Jaehyun was at. There were garters clipped to the top of them, but the shirt was too long to see where they led. He circled the pole and he sank down into a squat, back facing the crowd. From where Jaehyun was sitting he could see a pair of tiny black underwear and a deluge of desire washed over him. Taeyong stood up and turned around, grabbing the hem of his shirt and lifting it slightly. There were cheers from the crowd, Ten included. Taeyong stared out at the crowd, a shy smile on his face. He looked around, eyes skimming the guests and eventually falling on where Jaehyun was sitting. They made eye contact, suddenly, and Taeyong blinked a few times, looking surprised. The expression quickly faded, though, back to the facade of naivety. 

The show continued and Taeyong took off his shirt, leaving him in only lingerie that left very little to the imagination. Jaehyun swallowed, trying to force down the lump that had formed in his throat. He had to see him again after the show, even just to see him up close. Jaehyun didn’t even care what they did, as long as he could just look at him. The red glow of the stage lights reflected exquisitely off of Taeyong’s skin, shadows painting his lithe body flawlessly. Jaehyun wondered how one person could be so perfect. The music came to a close far too soon for Jaehyun’s liking and he was left sitting at the table, stomach crowded with butterflies. 

“Well, I sure am glad you dragged me back here,” Ten laughed, taking a sip of his drink. 

“How did you get a private dance for me last time?” Jaehyun asked, eyes on the stage as if Taeyong was still there. 

“You have to talk to the bartender, try not to embarrass yourself though.” 

In a few minutes Jaehyun was in the private room again, sitting on that familiar leather couch. His heart was pounding and he startled at the creak of the door opening. Taeyong stepped out, clad in a fluffy white robe that was far too big for him. Jaehyun couldn’t help the smile that appeared on his face. 

“You came back,” Taeyong observed, voice quiet. Their eyes locked and Taeyong walked over to the couch, immediately straddling Jaehyun’s lap. “Good boy, doing like I asked,” he purred in Jaehyun’s ear, the younger shuddering at the sudden closeness. 

“I-I-” Jaehyun stuttered, hands balling into fists. 

“You what?” 

“I wanted to see you again so bad.” 

Taeyong smirked and brought hands to Jaehyun’s neck. “I wanted to see you too, baby.”

Jaehyun’s stomach twisted and his eyes fluttered shut at the feeling of Taeyong’s palms on his skin. The term of endearment made Jaehyun feel funny and warm but he didn’t hate it. He wanted to hear Taeyong say it again and again. “You can touch me, you know.” 

“I wanted to--I want to, I didn’t know if it was okay,” Jaehyun breathed, opening his eyes and bringing tentative hands to Taeyong’s waist. The robe was falling away from Taeyong’s body and the skin of his shoulders and chest looked tantalizing. Taeyong moved forward, pressing his body closer against Jaehyun’s. A sigh slipped from the younger’s lips at the contact and he knew Taeyong could feel his arousal through his pants. Taeyong brought his face close to Jaehyun’s and tilted his head slightly, like he was about to kiss him. Jaehyun was breathing heavily and he could feel the tips of his ears reddening. Their lips were a hairsbreadth apart and Jaehyun closed his eyes again, unable to process what was happening. He could feel Taeyong leaning in and even more of his resolution crumbled, wanting so badly to kiss him. Jaehyun couldn’t though, he couldn’t let this get too personal, couldn’t let himself think that Taeyong wanted him back. 

Taeyong brushed his lips gently against Jaehyun’s, not quite a kiss but enough to make Jaehyun’s mouth fall open. Suddenly, Taeyong bit down hard on Jaehyun’s bottom lip, making the younger cry out in pain and arousal. His eyes snapped open and he whimpered, looking at Taeyong’s dark eyes--Jaehyun would never get enough of this, and it wasn’t even close to being over yet. Taeyong kissed him gently and the juxtaposition against the bite electrified the nerves in Jaehyun’s body, his lower half heating up quickly. “Do you normally kiss your clients?” Jaehyun asked as Taeyong moved down and worked at his neck. 

“No, not usually,” he answered, nipping at Jaehyun’s sensitive skin. “I don’t usually let them touch me either, but I couldn’t resist with you.” 

Jaehyun’s heart leaped out of his chest at Taeyong’s words. He didn’t usually let clients kiss our touch him but here he was, feeling the weight of the older on his lap and the warmth of his body beneath his fingertips. His shoulders were tense as he felt Taeyong’s hands ball up in the front of his shirt and he was way too turned on, arousal settling in his bottom half. Taeyong grinded his hips against Jaehyun’s crotch and shuddered, an angelic sigh leaving his lungs. Jaehyun was in so over his head and he wanted to indulge himself. “What do you mean you couldn’t resist?” 

Taeyong kissed him again and Jaehyun bit his bottom lip, begging to be let in. Taeyong opened his mouth and Jaehyun deepened the kiss, the heat in between them unbearable. The older licked at the bottom of his top teeth and fisted Jaehyun’s hair, pulling it just enough to hurt. Jaehyun moaned, enjoying the sensation too much especially when he could feel Taeyong trembling against him. Sexy, confident Taeyong was shaking, sighing in pleasure because of him. Taeyong pulled back, out of breath. “You’re so fucking sexy, that’s what I mean,” he gasped. 

Jaehyun’s face turned visibly red, even redder than before. “Fuck, fuck, Taeyong, please,” he begged, wanting to feel Taeyong pressed closer against him, if that was possible. He wrapped his arms around Taeyong’s slim waist, pulling him close and Taeyong squeaked in surprise. “Kiss me more, please.” 

Taeyong obliged, going straight in with his tongue in Jaehyun’s mouth. It was lustful, animalistic even, and the chemistry between them was incredible. Jaehyun had never wanted someone this bad, and he knew he would want him again and again. Taeyong sucked on his tongue and Jaehyun felt sweat beading at the back of his neck, Taeyong was beautiful, so beautiful, and not just in a sexual way. He was truly gorgeous, the kind of radiance that you couldn’t take your eyes off of. Jaehyun knew he would be coming back again and again, begging for more. “Wait, wait, Taeyong.” 

Taeyong pulled away, looking confused. His head was tilted and he looked adorable, which wasn’t Jaehyun shouldn’t be thinking. He felt bold though, confident from Taeyong’s attention. “Would- would you want to go out sometime?”

Taeyong stopped dead and stood up, brows furrowed. Jaehyun’s heart sank, arms reaching out instinctively to pull him back. “I’m not a prostitute,” he said, and Jaehyun wasn’t imagining the disappointment in his voice. 

“No, no, that’s not what I mean at all, Taeyong,” Jaehyun backpedalled, heart racing. “I don’t mean it like that.” 

“How did you mean it then? I’ve been in this situation before--this is my job, even if I enjoy it sometimes. I’m not going to fuck you just because you asked.” 

“I meant if you wanted to go out to dinner sometime, like a date,” Jaehyun said, sounding like a whisper. What the fuck was he doing, asking out some stripper who he was paying to grind on him. Like Taeyong said, this was his job. He was doing this to earn money, not because he wanted to. Taeyong was quiet for a moment and Jaehyun was desperate to fill the silence between them. “I just feel like we have good chemistry and I want to get to know you better, it’s not about sex, unless-” 

“Okay,” Taeyong cut him off.

“What?”

“I said okay, we can go out sometime. I agree with you, there’s a spark between us that I’ve never had with another client.”

Jaehyun breathed a sigh of relief, sinking into the couch. Taeyong leaned down and pressed a soft kiss to the corner of his mouth. “Just for you, though” he murmured, and another spark of arousal raced down Jaehyun’s spine. Taeyong snatched Jaehyun’s phone and put his number in before disappearing behind the door, leaving Jaehyun breathless and flushed, confused by what just happened.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> not to be that bitch who begs for comments/kudos but they literally give my dumbass a reason to live


	3. 3

Jaehyun was sitting in the waiting area of a restaurant, fiddling with the buttons on his cuffs. He wore a button up shirt, something stiff and uncomfortable that he hated but he was determined to look nice for his date. He pick a restaurant he had been to a few times before, somewhere he knew would be good and comfortable. The lights were low and there was a candle on each table, the waiters clad in collared shirts and ties. Only now did he realize how pretentious it could come off to Taeyong. It was about a week after the last time Jaehyun saw him, on a Saturday night when Taeyong didn’t have to work. Jaehyun still couldn’t believe he had agreed to go out with him. 

Said man came into the restaurant lobby, looking completely lost. He was wearing a loose, soft looking sweater and jeans, the sleeves coming past his fingertips. It made him look tiny, even more delicate than he usually looked. 

“Taeyong, hi,” Jaehyun said, standing up, not sure what to do with his hands. “You look really nice,” he commented, awkward. 

“Hi Jaehyun,” Taeyong smiled, cheeks a pretty pink color. “Should we go in?” 

The hostess led them to a table and Jaehyun pulled out the chair for Taeyong, the older grinning at his chivalry. 

“Jaehyun, I can’t let you get me this dinner,” Taeyong fretted, flipping through the menu. “Have you seen the prices? Please let me buy my own.” 

“No, no, please let me buy you dinner. Money isn’t an issue, please get whatever you want.” Taeyong looked apprehensive and Jaehyun kept reassuring him but his brow was still furrowed, corners of his mouth still downturned. “I’m serious, please don’t worry about it.” 

“If you say so,” Taeyong muttered, putting the menu down. The waiter came around and Taeyong ordered a salad, something cheap on the menu. Jaehyun wasn’t having it. 

“Do you like wine, Taeyong?” 

“I like it, but-”

“I’ll have a bottle of red. Whatever you recommend,” Jaehyun said to the waiter, handing him the menu. “Thank you.” 

“You didn’t have to do that, Jaehyun,” Taeyong mumbled, looking down at his hands. “Isn’t that really expensive?” 

Jaehyun dismissed his worry with a wave of the hand. “So do you not usually work on Saturdays?” 

Jaehyun could see Taeyong curl in on himself, closing off. He wouldn’t look up at Jaehyun and that worried him. The older was staring at a speck on the corner of the table and he wouldn’t tear his eyes away. “No, not usually. What do you do?” Taeyong asked, changing the subject.

“Oh, I’m in business actually, nothing super interesting.” 

“You must make good money, though, if you’re able to come here.” 

Jaehyun blushed, taking a sip of the wine the waiter had came and poured. Taeyong took a reluctant sip, letting a few drops of liquid pass his lips. “I’ve never actually had red wine before.” 

“Really? What do you think?” Jaehyun asked, shocked that Taeyong had never tried it. For Jaehyun he would barely drink anything else, aside from the occasional mixed drink. Taeyong smiled shyly.

“It’s good,” he said. His voice was quiet and his cheeks were pink. Jaehyun found it surprising, if not painfully endearing.  
“What do you like to do in your spare time?” 

“I work a lot so I don’t have a lot of free time, but when I do I like to cook. Baking is my favorite.” Jaehyun’s irresponsible mind ran with that thought to somewhere dangerous. He started to think about Taeyong in his kitchen, Taeyong wiping the sweat off of his forehead as he focused on something on the stove, Jaehyun wiping an extra bit of frosting off of Taeyong’s lip after he tasted the cake he baked. It was surprising that demure, sensual Taeyong liked to bake. Jaehyun wanted to know more, learn other things about the man in front of him. “I’ve been told I make really good cookies.” 

“I’d love to try them sometime and see for myself.” 

“I’d love that too,” Taeyong said. “What about you, what would someone like yourself be doing tonight if you weren’t out with me?” 

“I swear, I’m so boring. I would probably home alone drinking wine and watching something stupid on TV.” Taeyong looked doubtful, leaning back against the booth. 

He raised an eyebrow at the younger. “I find that hard to believe.” 

“I’m serious! I really wouldn’t be doing anything tonight.”

“I know, I’m just messing with you, Jaehyun,” Taeyong giggled, and the younger’s heart clenched at Taeyong’s chiming laugh. It made him laugh too, and they slipped into comfortable conversation until they finished their meal. 

“I had a really nice time, Taeyong,” Jaehyun said, looking down at Taeyong. “Did you drive here?” 

“No, actually I took a cab. I’ll just call one right now to get back.” 

“No, I’ll give you a ride,” Jaehyun shushed Taeyong when he made a noise of protest. “Please, let me take you home.” 

Taeyong slipped into Jaehyun’s passenger seat, buckling his seatbelt and picking at his cuticle. “So, where do you live?” 

Taeyong paused for a moment, digging at a hangnail on his thumb. Jaehyun saw it start to bleed and watched the way the blood collected in Taeyong’s nail bed, coloring it a vibrant red. He also saw Taeyong’s chest moving, rising and falling quickly. He vaguely recalled something from a science class a while ago, that the lighter the blood, the more oxygen it contained. Taeyong wiped the blood away, leaving a sticky film on his finger and was looking at Jaehyun’s lap from the corner of his eye. A moment had passed and he wasn’t saying anything. 

“Or would you rather come back to my place?” Jaehyun asked. 

“Yeah, that would be better.” 

After a short drive Jaehyun held Taeyong’s hand, leading him to his apartment and in through the door. Jaehyun sat down on the couch and Taeyong took a seat on his lap immediately, knees straddling either side of his thighs. Jaehyun wrapped his hands around Taeyong’s slim waist, yearning to feel his searing skin underneath his shirt. Taeyong swallowed and Jaehyun’s breath got caught in his throat. It was just like before, Taeyong was flushed, submissive, willing, but now it was even better. Now they could have their way with each other, and it wasn’t on a filthy couch in a strip club on a time crunch. Taeyong settled his hands on Jaehyun’s shoulders and the younger could feel the tension in Taeyong’s body through his fingertips. “Taeyong, come here,” Jaehyun said, wanting Taeyong to make the first move. 

Taeyong brought a palm to Jaehyun’s cheek and let his thumb rest on his full bottom lip, dragging it down slightly. Jaehyun wrapped his lips around it and Taeyong shuddered, exhaling. It was still bloody and a metallic taste lingered in Jaehyun’s mouth, turning him on more than he’d like to admit. Taeyong watched his eyes flutter shut and he could count Jaehyun’s long, thick eyelashes. He was pretty, and Taeyong slipped his thumb out from his lips. “Taeyong, wait-” 

Taeyong leaned in and kissed Jaehyun with fervor, a compulsion coming over him. He bit his lip, hard, just like he did the first time they kissed. Something like a growl, predatory and feral, came out of Jaehyun and it sent a chill down Taeyong’s spine. This was Jaehyun, unabridged and greedy. The thought of Jaehyun doing whatever he wanted to him made Taeyong shiver. 

Tilting his head, Jaehyun deepened the kiss, slipping his hands under Taeyong’s shirt. His skin was soft and warm and Jaehyun wanted his mouth all over it with a vehemence. Taeyong licked into Jaehyun’s mouth, tasting the remnants of his blood and the flavor of red wine. Both were a crimson red, as was the feeling in Taeyong’s stomach. Jaehyun dug his fingernails into Taeyong’s delicate sides and the older whined, the noise sending heat straight to Jaehyun’s groin. “God, fuck, Jaehyun,” Taeyong whispered against his lips. 

Jaehyun pushed Taeyong down onto his back and now Taeyong was ready to submit, to let Jaehyun have him however he wanted. A feeling resembling fear lingered in his chest, but this was different. This was pleasure, both given and taken. Jaehyun pulled off his shirt, smoothing his hands over the expanse of his chest and feeling the ridges of his bones, pants following shortly after. He kissed him again, going straight in with his tongue and it was filthy, carnal even. Taeyong whined, pulling up the hem of Jaehyun’s shirt and the larger pulled it over his head, landing forgotten on the floor. 

Taeyong realized this was the first time he had seen Jaehyun unclothed and he stared. The lines of his torso were unforgivingly masculine, muscles carved in his arms with prominent collarbones. He was gorgeous. 

“Fuck, you’re so beautiful,” Jaehyun said, shaking. 

“I was thinking the same about you.” 

Jaehyun’s mouth latched onto Taeyong’s neck, lapping at the spot right behind his ear. His teeth worked at his earlobe and Taeyong was going insane with desire but he knew he had to take it, let Jaehyun do what he wanted. The feeling of Jaehyun’s breath tickled and he whined, bring a hand in between Jaehyun’s shoulder blades. 

“Is that a good spot for you?” Jaehyun whispered, and Taeyong dug his nails into Jaehyun’s back as a response, hard. The younger groaned and started again, taking his time laving at the soft space, nipping lightly and reveling in each shudder from Taeyong. He moved to the other side, working at it just as hard and sucking a mark right at the top of his neck. The older was painfully hard, lifting his hips off the couch, pleading for more. 

Jaehyun wanted to torture him though, slowly kissing down Taeyong’s neck. Desire consumed both of them but they wanted to savor it--they had all night and Jaehyun was in no rush. He wanted Taeyong to be properly turned on, asking, _begging_ Jaehyun to fuck him how he needed to be fucked. Jaehyun could feel the outline of Taeyong’s cock against his leg. 

Taeyong whined when Jaehyun pulled away and his wet eyes were wet looking at the man above him, the man on top of him, the man in control. His eyelids fluttered shut and he willed the nerves away, clenching his hands into fists. 

“What do you want?” Jaehyun purred, elbows on either side of Taeyong. “What do you want me to do to you, Taeyong?” 

Nothing came to mind, Taeyong was incredibly turned on but he couldn’t think of anything to say, that he could be given. He wanted to be touched, admired, adored, but he bit his tongue. “Whatever you want to do to me, Jaehyun.” 

The larger wrapped his lips around a nipple, rolling it in between his teeth and Taeyong wound his fingers in Jaehyun’s hair, always having been especially sensitive there. It felt good, too good, and he hoped Jaehyun was enjoying himself. Jaehyun moved down, kissing around his belly button and Taeyong sucked in his stomach at the sensation. A part of him felt confused, unsure why this was happening. 

The uneasiness intensified when Jaehyun dug the heel of his hand into Taeyong’s crotch but it was quickly replaced by pleasure. Jaehyun was moving lower, so low, until Taeyong could feel his breath tickling his clothed cock. He couldn’t breathe, it was too much. Jaehyun brought his lips to the front of his briefs, sucking on the head of his cock through the fabric. Taeyong felt a spurt of precum making a wet spot on his underwear and Jaehyun licked at it happily, driving Taeyong insane. Jaehyun pulled away after a few minutes of sweet torture, coming back up to kiss Taeyong’s mouth. 

The air in the room was stiflingly hot but the two of them didn’t mind, their slick bodies moving against each other easier. Taeyong’s heartbeat was volatile, thudding against the inside of his rib cage. He hissed when Jaehyun’s thumbs grazed over his nipples. 

“I wanted you since the first moment I saw you come on stage, Taeyong, so gorgeous, so fuckable,” Jaehyun purred, kisses peppered between words. Taeyong’s heart pounded faster. “Now I can have you, finally, you’re all mine.” 

Jaehyun’s hand reached for Taeyong’s waistband but the older froze, joints tensing. Something felt wrong, and Taeyong knew he shouldn’t be feeling this way. A mix of emotions were swirling in his gut and he couldn’t go through with it, he needed to think. “Wait, don’t,” he said, eyes screwed shut. Jaehyun sat up with a look of concern on his face. 

“What’s wrong?” Jaehyun asked, bringing a palm to Taeyong’s cheek again. “Did I do something?” 

Taeyong scooted away, sitting up against the arm of the couch. “I- I- is this why you took me out tonight?” 

“What? No, of course not-” 

“You just want to fuck, thats what you want, right?” Taeyong interrupted, drawing his knees to his chest, feeling exposed. 

“No, Taeyong, please listen to me,” Jaehyun pleaded, crawling forward carefully. “That’s not why I took you out tonight, I promise you.” 

“Why did you, then?” 

Jaehyun was shellshocked, feeling like someone just dumped a bucket of ice water on his head. Of course, he wanted to fuck Taeyong, but that’s not why he asked him out, there was just something about him, like he was a puzzle he wanted to figure out. He wanted to know Taeyong, despite everything being had to that point solely physical. 

“You’re intriguing, Taeyong, you’re one way on stage but then at dinner you were someone else--in a good way,” Jaehyun started, stumbling over the words. “We had a spark at the club and I find you incredibly attractive, but I want to get to know you outside of that. I promise.” 

Taeyong let out a shuddering breath that he had been holding in. The words sounded nice floating in his ears, but there was still apprehension. “Are you serious?” 

“Dead serious, Taeyong, and I’m so sorry if I gave you the wrong impression. I thought you were enjoying yourself just now.” 

“I was, I’m just- I’m just not sure if I want to do this right now,” Taeyong said. 

“Of course, that’s okay Taeyong, we don’t have to.” 

With those words it was like a weight was lifted off Taeyong’s shoulders. He didn’t have to do this right now, the thought reassured by Jaehyun’s words. The younger reached his arms out and Taeyong crawled over, wrapping his arms around his solid torso, loving the warmth against the delicate skin on the inside of his arms. Jaehyun hugged him tightly and laid back, letting Taeyong rest against his chest. 

“Thank you, Jaehyun,” Taeyong murmured, closing his eyes. 

“You don’t need to thank me, Taeyong,” Jaehyun said, squeezing the smaller a little tighter. He could feel Taeyong shaking and it broke his heart, wanting more than anything for him to be comfortable. He brought a hand to his hair, combing through it until he felt Taeyong relax. 

Taeyong’s mind stopped racing, and he felt strangely calm laying on Jaehyun. Something foreign rested in his chest, resembling assurance or maybe safety. 

The fact that there was a lot for them to talk about went unsaid.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> comments and kudos make a sad bitch (me) v happy! thank you all for reading and im sorry i can't write anythign without adding angst lol


	4. 4

When Jaehyun woke up there were warm limbs wrapped around him with pink hair tickling his nose and there was an unreasonable swell of happiness in his chest. Taeyong smelled good, he thought, like fresh sheet and a little bit like last night’s cologne. He savored the feeling of their skin touching each other, both of them falling asleep without putting shirts on. Jaehyun could get used to this. However, he desperately had to pee. 

Jaehyun pressed kisses into Taeyong’s hair, hoping to rouse him from sleep. “Taeyong,” he whispered, gentle. “Taeyongie, are you awake?” 

The older hummed, hugging Jaehyun tighter, so tight it hurt a little bit. Jaehyun brought a hand to Taeyong’s face, running his fingers along his cheekbones, the edge of his sharp jaw bone, letting his thumb linger on Taeyong’s pink lips. He was so pretty, so young and peaceful looking in sleep. Jaehyun could look at him forever and not get sick of it. “Wake up, Taeyong,” Jaehyun murmured, playing with Taeyong’s hair. “I have to go to the bathroom, but I’ll come right back.” 

Taeyong rolled over, facing away from the younger. Jaehyun took a moment to admire the knobs of Taeyong’s spine before he dragged himself out of bed. When he returned Taeyong wrapped around him immediately, letting his face rest in the crook of Jaehyun’s neck. “Do you like to cuddle, Taeyong?” 

“Maybe,” Taeyong said, breath tickling the soft skin of Jaehyun’s neck. Jaehyun hugged Taeyong closer, and he drifted off again. 

It was Taeyong who woke up before Jaehyun this time, breathing in and letting the air of the room and Jaehyun’s scent calm him. He could feel his heart beating, steadily and slowly, like he was completely relaxed and miraculously, he was. Taeyong rolled himself completely onto Jaehyun, letting his weight rest completely on the larger. Jaehyun peeked an eye open and Taeyong’s chin was on his chest, looking at him. What a blissful morning, Jaehyun thought. 

“Good morning,” Jaehyun wheezed, lungs crushed by the other. “I feel like you’re looking up my nose.” 

“So what if I am?” Taeyong countered, smiling. “I like the inside of your nose.” 

“You’re weird,” Jaehyun laughed, and Taeyong’s heart did a backflip. Jaehyun coaxed Taeyong off of him and sat up, pulling him closer to sit on his lap. Taeyong kissed him, close lipped and tender, chest pressed flush to Jaehyun. He bit at his lip lazily, no urgency in their movements. They had all morning, they could take all the time that they wanted. Jaehyun could hear Taeyong sigh and it was beautiful, a noise that Jaehyun wanted to hear over and over. Taeyong pulled away, panting against Jaehyun’s lips. Jaehyun pecked him once and then leaned back. “Are you hungry?” 

Taeyong grinned and got up with a start, racing out the door. “Where are you going?” Jaehyun called after him, missing the heat of his body against him and following him into the kitchen. Taeyong was busying himself in the kitchen and pulling stuff out of Jaehyun’s fridge and cabinets. “Why are you tearing apart my kitchen?” 

“It’s a secret, go sit down,” Taeyong mused, clearly very focused. Jaehyun pouted and went to the couch turning on the television. He turned on a gameshow that let half an hour pass by mindlessly, and he was so spaced out he didn’t register the heavenly smell that filled his apartment. 

“Hey Jaehyun?” Taeyong called from the other room, the name rolling off of his tongue with a lilt in his voice. Jaehyun was very engrossed by family feud and didn’t respond, so Taeyong had to come get him. Taeyong stood in front of him and leaned down to kiss him, taking Jaehyun by surprised. Just before Jaehyun could react he pulled away and dragged Jaehyun to kitchen, sitting him down at the table and pouring him a glass of juice. Only then did Jaehyun smell what Taeyong had been making. 

“What have you been up to, Taeyongie?” 

“I made you cookies, silly,” Taeyong smiled, setting the plate in front of him. “You said you wanted to try them, right?” 

Jaehyun smiled so wide his cheeks hurt, so stupidly happy that Taeyong made something for him, remembered something that he said. “I would love to try them.” 

Taeyong sat down across from him at the kitchen table and gestured for Jaehyun to eat a cookie. The younger bit into one, still warm from the oven, and the most divine taste filled his mouth. They were soft with a rich, buttery flavor that melted on his tongue and he closed his eyes, indulging himself. Jaehyun thanked god he happened to have all of the ingredients for chocolate chip cookies, because these were the best he had ever tasted. “Thoughts?” Taeyong asked, expectantly. 

Jaehyun opened his eyes and maybe it was the fact that he was eating the most delicious thing he had ever put in his mouth but Taeyong looked unbelievably beautiful. He was resting his elbows on the table, face in his hands, and sun from the window behind him shined in and illuminated the space behind him. Taeyong looked like an angel, Jaehyun was sure of it. “Jaehyun?” Taeyong asked, tilting his head. Jaehyun couldn’t think straight. 

“They’re amazing, the best in the world, seriously,” Jaehyun said. “Where did you learn to make these?” 

“I went to culinary school for a little while, actually. I wanted to be a pastry chef, but I didn’t finish school,” Taeyong explained, reaching for one of his own cookies and taking a bite. “I’m a pretty good cook.”

“Will you make me dinner sometime?” Jaehyun asked, hopeful. He would do anything to have Taeyong in his presence, and eating delicious food wasn’t a bad perk. Taeyong nodded, a big smile on his face and Jaehyun reveled in how adorable he was, his big eyes turning into crescents as the grin spread to his cheeks. Even his teeth were cute. 

“Why didn’t you finish school, if you don’t mind me asking,” Jaehyun said, voice trailing off at the end. He regretted the question as soon as it came out of his mouth as he watched Taeyong deflate, his smile disappearing. He looked like he did the night before when he scooted away from Jaehyun with such a sad look in his eyes. “I’m sorry, you don’t--” 

“I ran out of money, honestly. Then I found my job, but it took up a lot of time and I couldn’t focus on school and didn’t do too well in my classes,” Taeyong was staring at a spot on the table. “Eventually I had to drop out.” 

Jaehyun wasn’t sure what to say, his mouth hanging open stupidly. Taeyong spoke for him. “It’s okay, though. It sounds stupid but things happen for a reason, right?” 

“Definitely, Taeyong,” Jaehyun sighed, looking at the man in front of him. A moment of quiet past, the two still demolishing the plate of cookies. “Should we talk about last night?” 

Taeyong’s lips drew to a hard line and he didn’t say anything, putting his half eaten cookie back on the plate. Panicking, Jaehyun started talking. “I completely understand if you don’t want to talk about it, it’s just that we’re getting to know each other, and I really want to know you better, so I want to know what happened last night. You’re very different on stage and off stage--which isn’t bad, of course it’s not bad. I really like that about you. If you don’t want to tell me about what happened last night, I totally get it, but I’d love to know.” 

“You done?”

“Yeah, I think so,” Jaehyun sighed, letting out a breath he had been holding in. Taeyong picked up his cookie again and took a bite, Jaehyun doing the same. 

“This has happened before, where a client asks me out because they feel like we had something. So I agree, they take me out, and then they try to fuck me because that was their goal all along,” Taeyong sniffed, rubbing at suspiciously wet eyes. “I told you before that I’m not a prostitute, but when these people were done using me, using my body however they wanted, they would throw some money into my hand and call me a cab. I would take it, too.

“Stripping, sex, those are the things I’m good at--the only things I’m good at, and I feel so fucking dirty sometimes but I can’t stop, I need the money. I had a really nice time last night at dinner and I asked to go back to your place because I truly wanted to. And when we got here it was great, it felt so good and for once I was enjoying this part of my job because it was mutual, you weren’t just using me. You were paying attention to me. 

“But then I started to think, this is just how him trying to convince me, to let him do whatever he wants to me. And then some of the things that you said, that I was all yours and that you wanted to fuck me since your first saw me, those things--”

“Taeyong, no, please, that’s not what I meant by those things, I promise,” Jaehyun interrupted. Taeyong paid him no mind. 

“That’s what I thought at the time, that you brought me here just to fuck. I felt like with you, though, I could say no if I wanted and you would stop. That maybe this experience wasn’t just about the other person for once. So I did, and you stopped. 

“And then you let me stay, you didn’t kick me out to go back to my piece of shit apartment and cry until I couldn’t feel anything. For once I felt like a person and not like a service like I did with other clients. So thank you for that, and thank you for wanting to get to know me, honestly.”

It was quiet between them for a moment before Jaehyun spoke up. “Of course, Taeyong. Being honest, I asked you out initially because we had that chemistry physically and I wanted to see where that would take us--we could see if we matched just as well emotionally. It was never just about sex, though. Also, you’re not only good at sex, you also make some amazing cookies.” 

“I know now, and thank you for being honest with me,” Taeyong smiled, reaching to grab Jaehyun’s hand across the table. The younger tangled their feet together and squeezed Taeyong’s hands, and it was like a weight had been lifted. “I’m glad I agreed to go out with you.” 

“I’m glad too, Taeyong,” Jaehyun assured. The cookies had gotten cold, but they were still delicious as they talked the day away.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hope you enjoyed this boring ass chapter that i added for pacing/context's sake. don't worry y'all hoe asses cause what i know you want is coming next chapter


	5. 5

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i have no idea how to stick to one POV (also please check updated tags)

“Can I come over, baby?” Taeyong asked, a tremble in his voice. “Please?” 

It was late, maybe two in the morning on a Friday night and Jaehyun’s phone woke him from sleep. When he saw it was Taeyong’s name on the screen he sat up immediately, knowing it must be something important. Taeyong normally worked Friday nights until late, usually going home straight after and then calling Jaehyun in the morning. 

“Of course, what’s wrong Taeyongie?” 

“I’ll- I’ll tell you when I get there, okay? I’m going to get a cab.” 

There was a knock on the door within an hour, Jaehyun getting up to open it for Taeyong. The older barreled into to Jaehyun’s arms, clutching helplessly at the front of his tee. Jaehyun brought arms around him right away and pulled Taeyong into the apartment, closing the door with his foot as his hands were occupied. “Taeyong, baby, what’s wrong?” 

“I’m lovable, right? I’m not dirty, not a slut, right?” Taeyong looked up at Jaehyun with wet eyes and a furrowed brow and Jaehyun’s heart clenched at the sight. 

“Of course, of course Taeyong, you’re kind and beautiful and so lovable,” Jaehyun assured. “What happened? Why are you upset?”  
“I don’t know, can we just, can we just do this?” 

Taeyong kissed Jaehyun before he answered, pushing him toward the bedroom. Jaehyun was shocked, couldn’t move, so he let Taeyong kiss him senseless until the smaller shoved him onto the bed. “Wait, Taeyong slow down, stop.” 

He stood still, in front of the edge of the bed as Jaehyun sat up. Taeyong was panting, his heavy breaths coming out more like sobs. He sat down on the bed next to Jaehyun and rested his face in his hands, back shuddering erratically as he started to really cry. Jaehyun got down and kneeled in front of him, resting his chin on the other’s knees. “Taeyong, please talk to me.” 

Taeyong’s red eyes peeked through the gaps between his fingers before he covered them again and then ran his fingers through unkempt hair. “I had a client tonight after the show and it was going as usual, but they started to touch me and I tried to stop them, I tried to grab their hands to stop, and- and-”

Taeyong trailed off and Jaehyun put a hand on his knee, running his fingers over the fabric of his pants. “It’s okay, keep going.”

“I grabbed their hands to stop them and they got angry and hit me, and I told them not to do that, not to hit me, and they just got more mad,” Taeyong wept, and Jaehyun could see the tears spilling from his eyes. “They told me I wasn’t worth anything, and that I was a slut but I couldn’t even do that right. I felt so disgusting, so useless, Jaehyun, I felt-” 

Taeyong was crying too hard to speak, sobs wracking his body. Jaehyun sat back up on the bed and pulled Taeyong close, letting him stain his sleep shirt with tears and snot, and Jaehyun didn’t even mind. “It’s okay, baby, you can cry Taeyong.” 

A few moments passed before Taeyong stopped clinging to Jaehyun and could speak again but Jaehyun held him in the meantime. When he quieted down Jaehyun pulled away gently and looked at the other's tear streaked face. His nose was runny and he looked like a mess but Jaehyun didn’t mind. He got up, to Taeyong’s distress, and got a box of tissues from the bathroom, wiping gently at Taeyong’s face. 

“I ran out on him, Jaehyun, I told him to fuck off and I left. That’s when I called you,” Taeyong sniffed, resting on Jaehyun’s shoulder. “I’m going to get fired, Jaehyun. Mistreating a client is cause for automatic firing.” 

“You weren’t mistreating him, Taeyong, he was mistreating you,” Jaehyun said, turning to wrap his arms around Taeyong’s shaking body. “You did the right thing, you don’t deserve any disrespect like that, and you’re sure as hell not disgusting or useless.” 

“I’m not?” 

The hurt in Taeyong’s voice made Jaehyun want to break down. He had seen Taeyong cry before, but only at movies with cute animal scenes that they had watched together. In those moments Jaehyun would hold him like this and wipe away his tears, but it hurt much more this time. They had been seeing each other for a few weeks and the days he saw Taeyong were some of the most beautiful of his life. Taeyong was incredible and sweet and important, so hearing the doubt, the questioning that he felt out loud was painful. “Of course not, Taeyong. You’re beautiful and lovable and wonderful.” 

“Thank you, Jaehyunnie,” Taeyong clung to him closer and Jaehyun ran fingers through his hair before laying down and bringing Taeyong next to him, reveling in the way they curled around each other. Taeyong’s breathing slowed down, the calm after the storm. It was late, probably three in the morning. “Are you tired, Jaehyun?” 

“No, are you?” 

“No, not at all,” Taeyong murmured, rolling on top of Jaehyun and kissing him softly on the lips. Jaehyun chased him, craning his neck up to kiss Taeyong back and rolling them over so he was on top. Taeyong squeaked at the change, feeling small under Jaehyun’s strong form. The larger slipped a tongue into his mouth, tasting him and bringing heat to his cheeks. “Are you feeling better, Taeyong?” Jaehyun asked against his lips. 

“Yeah, I am, kiss me more please,” Taeyong breathed, pulling Jaehyun back down and the younger obliged, grinding his hips down as desire unfolded between their bodies. Taeyong could feel Jaehyun’s length against his crotch and it made him shudder, body submitting on instinct as Jaehyun kissed his neck, laving at his soft skin. Taeyong brought fingers to Jaehyun’s hair, encouraging him, wanting him to enjoy himself. A shudder of arousal raced through him as Jaehyun bit down. “God, Jaehyun, take me, do whatever you want, please.” 

“Is that what you want?” 

The question caught Taeyong off guard. Of course it was what he wanted, he wanted Jaehyun to enjoy himself, lose himself in Taeyong’s body. “Yes, I want you to feel good, I want you to do what you want.” 

Jaehyun huffed, pulling away from the smaller. Taeyong whined at the loss of contact but Jaehyun shushed him, sitting back on his heels. “But I want to do what you want, Taeyong.” 

“What? This is what I want though,” Taeyong protested, just wanting Jaehyun back on top of him. “Please just do with me whatever you like.” _It’s what I’m good for_ went unsaid. 

“I want you to tell me exactly what you want, step by step, and then I want to give it to you. Don’t tell me you want me to do what I want, please. I want you to think about it and tell me.” 

Taeyong opened his mouth and closed it, unsure of what to say, nodding instead. Jaehyun smiled and leaned down to kiss him, dimples showing on his face and Taeyong felt warm. “Okay, I want you to kiss my neck again.” 

And so Jaehyun did, indulging a squirmy Taeyong as unchecked passion grew between them. Jaehyun knew exactly how to make him breathless, make him desperate for more. “Take off your clothes.” 

The younger pulled his shirt over his head and Taeyong’s breathing was labored, his chest rising and falling quickly as Jaehyun slipped off his pants and boxers right after. Taeyong was looking at him, the red splotches on his chest from the heat and the way his waist tapered into narrow hipbones. His mouth was dry as he looked back up at Jaehyun’s dark eyes, pupils blown. “Undress me, please.” 

Jaehyun kissed him with devotion before sliding his hands underneath Taeyong’s shirt, fingertips slightly rough from years of use. Taeyong shivered and his eyes fluttered shut as he exhaled, fisting the sheets. Jaehyun took his time pushing the hem of Taeyong’s shirt, savoring the slow reveal of his flesh. He was tantalizing and Jaehyun wanted nothing more than to devour him, ravish him until he was gasping--this wasn’t about what he wanted, though. Taeyong was naked now by Jaehyun’s hand and the younger took the liberty of kissing him, letting steam continue to simmer between them. 

“Will you suck me off, Jaehyun? Please?” 

“Yes, of course,” Jaehyun breathed, head spinning. They hadn’t gone beyond kissing after that first night together and the thought of having Taeyong in his mouth made Jaehyun’s cock twitch. 

Taeyong’s length was laying heavy against his stomach and Jaehyun’s mouth watered at the thought of getting Taeyong off like that. He kissed him one last time on the lips before moving down, trailing his mouth down his torso before reaching his cock. Taeyong’s eyes were screwed shut and his hands were balled into fists, body trembling. “Are you okay, Taeyong?” 

“Yes, yes, I’m okay, just keep going Jaehyun.” 

Jaehyun looked up at him for a moment before sinking down on Taeyong’s length, taking half of it in one go. Taeyong gasped, tears beginning to spill from his eyes as he tried to choke back a moan. He brought a hand to Jaehyun’s hair, coaxing him down further and Jaehyun took more of him in his mouth, Taeyong sobbing at the feeling. Jaehyun began moving up and down, taking turns sucking on the head and letting Taeyong’s cock hit the back of his throat. The older pulled on Jaehyun’s soft hair, messy from sleep and the younger groaned, a delicious feeling settling in Taeyong’s core from the vibration. Taeyong pulled on his hair, signalling him to stop. “Can I fuck your mouth, Jaehyun?” 

Jaehyun nodded, relaxing his throat as best he could around Taeyong and looking up, giving permission. Taeyong settled both hands in Jaehyun’s hair and breathed, like he was preparing himself. The thrusts started out slow and shallow, letting Jaehyun adjust to the motion and Taeyong felt a spurt of precum from his cock. Jaehyun closed his eyes and savored the taste, loving the feeling of Taeyong in his mouth, Taeyong feeling good, getting off because of him. Tayeong deserved pleasure, affection, love, and giving it to him was euphoric. 

Taeyong whimpered as he began thrusting faster, deeper, the flutter around his cock absolutely divine. Jaehyun was taking him so well, so open and willing and it made him feel something unfamiliar. The telltale coiling in his gut began and he pulled on Jaehyun’s hair as a warning. “Jaehyun, baby, I’m going to cum.” 

The younger gulped around him and Taeyong’s thrusts were erratic before he climaxed, flooding Jaehyun’s mouth. He moaned at the taste and swallowed him down, making Taeyong shiver. Jaehyun pulled off, wiping at his lip. “Good?” 

“God, so fucking good,” Taeyong sighed, running an affection hand through Jaehyun’s hair. The larger moved to kiss him and Taeyong felt a filthy tinge of arousal run through him as he tasted himself, despite his exhaustion. He wanted more, needed more, and finally he could be given more. “Fuck me, Jaehyun, please fuck me.” 

“Yes, of course,” Jaehyun murmured, his lower half heating up. He grabbed lube from the bedside table, pouring some and warming it up on his fingers. Taeyong let his legs fall open, exquisitely submissive. “Is this okay?” he asked, needing permission to touch Taeyong. The older nodded, eager. 

Jaehyun pushed a finger in and Taeyong fluttered around him, tensing up at the intrusion. Taeyong reached up, needing Jaehyun to kiss him as he entered his body, needing the comfort. Taeyong had been entered many time before but rarely was it a gesture of sensuality, shared passion. He needed the comfort, to know Jaehyun was there and that he saw him, truly felt his body underneath him. “Okay, baby?” 

Taeyong nodded at the question, heart doing a backflip in his tight chest. Jaehyun kissed him lightly on the lips and started moving his finger in and out, adding a second after a few moments. It was uncomfortable now, a little bit of a stretch, but Taeyong wanted nothing more than this. He gasped, pressing the back of his head into the pillow in pleasure. Jaehyun moved slowly, preparing Taeyong thoroughly before adding another finger. His worst fear was to hurt Taeyong. 

The older grabbed onto Jaehyun’s biceps, digging his nails into the hard muscle. It was already too much, already felt so good, and Taeyong knew he would be entirely overwhelmed in a very short while. “I’m ready now, please fuck me Jaehyun.”

And so Jaehyun did, rolling a condom on and lubing himself up before pressing into Taeyong’s body and fuck, the older was so hot, so wet and tight and Jaehyun had to do everything in his power not to fuck into him senselessly. He stilled, letting Taeyong adjust and kissed him, biting gently at his bottom lip while lust consumed him. Taeyong's hands were cupping his face, kissing back desperately as tears started flowing again. “Move, please,” he hummed against Jaehyun’s cheek. 

He began to move and the drag against Taeyong’s insides was so delicious, both of their nerves on fire. Jaehyun pulled back slowly, reveling in the way Taeyong’s thighs trembled in time with his gasping breaths. He reached his hands up, needing to be touched, kissed. Jaehyun pressed his mouth to Taeyong’s cheek and then to suck on his earlobe, knowing Taeyong was sensitive there. The smaller whined, low in his throat, the slow movement not enough. 

“Jaehyun, more,” he begged, “harder.” 

The thrusts got faster, more force behind each one and Taeyong was losing it, his mind fogging and lust clouding his judgement. He was delirious, thrashing his head back and forth at the sensations that Jaehyun was giving him, but he still wanted more. He wanted to be destroyed and then put back together again, fucked within an inch of his life and then pulled back to safety. All he needed to do was ask, he reminded himself, this was about what he wanted. He could ask to be bloodied, bruised, sated, and it would be given to him. 

Jaehyun’s brows were furrowed and his jaw was clenched, sweat beading on his forehead. He looked so gorgeous, so fucking sexy, but Taeyong was still entirely too coherent. “Jaehyun, fuck, Jaehyunnie,” Taeyong choked, the wind knocked out of him by a particularly forceful thrust. “I want more, make me yours, mark me, anything, I just want it to hurt.” 

“God, Taeyong, fuck,” Jaehyun said, stilling for a moment, breaths violent. He grabbed the back of Taeyong’s thigh, lifting it over his shoulder and fuck, the angle was so much better, deeper. Taeyong felt like he was being split in half, the stretch so lewd, so raw. Jaehyun started driving into Taeyong’s body and Taeyong cried out, Jaehyun’s cocking hitting the spot inside of him perfectly. He couldn’t control himself, screaming, and Jaehyun kissed him to muffle the noise. Taeyong needed some sort of release, some way to get rid of this tension in his body so he dug his nails into Jaehyun’s back. The younger groaned, slamming into him harder, loving the burn spreading from the welts between his shoulder blades. 

There was still one more thing Taeyong wanted, _needed_ in order to cum, and he was desperate to get it. His cock was so hard he couldn’t stand it, craving release. He trailed a hand down Jaehyun’s arm, gripping around his wrist and bringing it to his neck. Jaehyun’s eyes darkened, desire swirling in his irises. “Choke me, Jaehyun, I need it.” 

“Fuck, are you sure, Taeyong? I don’t want to hurt you,” Jaehyun murmured, apprehensive. In all honestly Jaehyun wanted to choke Taeyong, to see his eyes roll back in his head, oxygen cut off, losing control. The thought of it was so fucking sexy. 

“I’ll pull your hand away if I need too.” 

Jaehyun nodded, settling his hand over the soft flesh of Taeyong’s neck and letting his thumb rest in the divot right above the center of his clavicle. Taeyong’s grip around his wrist tightened and Jaehyun started moving again, the older tight around his length. He squeezed Taeyong’s neck, thumb pressing into that spot and Taeyong gasped, half in pleasure and half in pain. It was so fucking good, so fucking perfect, incredibly euphoric. Taeyong’s orgasm crept up on him, breaths coming out as labored wheezes, just how he wanted. His vision clouded at the edges as he felt the heat pooling in his gut, and he needed to be touched so he brought his other hand down to stroke himself in time with Jaehyun’s powerful thrusts. 

Jaehyun released his neck with a tug on his wrist and Taeyong came violently, hard over his stomach. Oxygen overwhelmed his system and Taeyong cried, feeling too many things at once. Jaehyun thrusted harder, chasing his own climax and spilling into the condom, spurred on by Taeyong pulsing around him. The larger collapsed, too exhausted to care about the filth in between them. They were both so satisfied, neither of them could remember the last time they were so deliciously sated. 

Taeyong wrapped shaking arms around Jaehyun’s sore back, trying to steady his breathing. Jaehyun kissed him, tender and chaste, and Taeyong’s heart skipped a beat. They made out lazily for awhile, letting the sweat dry and heat dissipate. Taeyong’s chest was full in a way that he was unfamiliar with, and his heart swelled when Jaehyun cleaned him up and then cradled him like he was a treasure, something to be cherished. 

“Will you hold me until I fall asleep?” Taeyong asked, looking up at Jaehyun who was facing him with a palm on his cheek. The request was pure, unfiltered need and Taeyong wanted nothing more than for Jaehyun to wrap his arms around him and keep him safe. And so Jaehyun did.


	6. (epilogue)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> anything in italics is a flashback in case it gets confusing lol

They must have been keeping Taeyong late today, Jaehyun thought. It was later, way past when he was supposed to be done and Jaehyun wanted to get home and get in bed as soon as possible. It was cold out and the heated seat of his car could only do so much--he needed the warmth of another body and a fluffy blanket that the other body begged Jaehyun to buy him at the store. 

The morning after their first night together, Jaehyun woke up to soft kisses laid on his cheek, then his forehead, then his lips. Taeyong’s lips were a little chapped but the perfect shade of pink, Jaehyun remembered. Taeyong knew just how to work him up, entice him into flipping the older over onto his back and wasting the morning away. It was delightful, divine, and Jaehyun wanted nothing more to spend every day like this, waking up late and kissing the smaller lazily. He was so warm, so wonderful, like a bundle of love just for Jaehyun. He was too shy to say that, though. 

At least at the time. Taeyong didn’t want to go back to his place after that morning, so Jaehyun took him to his apartment to pick up his stuff and bring him back. They spent those next few days together, waking up every morning to fingertips pressing into bare skin with goosebumps left in their wake. Those days were marked by fond touches and whispered admirations, filling the space under blankets and between their bodies with tender affection. The worst part was when Jaehyun had to get out of bed and go to work, but the sting of leaving Taeyong was rectified when he came home one day to find him curled up under a blanket on the couch, lips parted gently, fading sunlight streaming in through the window. Jaehyun wanted to come home to that for the rest of his life. 

Probably twenty minutes had passed and Taeyong still wasn’t out. He was usually tripping over his feet running out to the car to see Jaehyun, not wanting to spend a minute apart. Jaehyun was really starting to get impatient, worried even. What if something bad happened? 

A few more minutes went by and finally, Jaehyun saw Taeyong coming out of the building, a look of restrained joy on his face. Jaehyun had seen this expression before, when Taeyong really wanted to tell him something, something really excited. Jaehyun adored him so much, loved when he got so excited like this. It was childlike and endearing. 

Taeyong ran up to the passenger side and pulled on the handle impatiently, door locked. Jaehyun laughed, watching him struggle for a minute before pressing the lock and letting him in. Taeyong whipped open the door and nearly dove into Jaehyun’s lap, giggling. “Baby, baby, guess what?” he asked, throwing his arms around Jaehyun’s shoulders. 

“What is it, honey?” 

The day that Taeyong fell asleep on Jaehyun’s couch was also the first day Taeyong was supposed to go back to work. Jaehyun knelt down next to him and nudged him awake and he shot up, immediately breaking down and pulling Jaehyun up next to him. _I don’t want to go, I can’t go, I’m scared Jaehyun. They’re going to fire me, or hurt me, or something._

Jaehyun’s heart broke, and he promised Taeyong that he would go with him. _I’ll be right there, I’ll keep you safe._

When they pulled up to the club, Taeyong told him to stay in the car. _I need to do this by myself, I can do this by myself._

After a little while Taeyong came out again, teary, silent as he got in the car. Jaehyun didn’t push it and drove them home, pulling Taeyong into bed and stroking his hair as the smaller dug the heels of his hands into his eyes, sobs escaping from his chest. The moment passed, and Taeyong calmed down. _Taeyong, what happened?_

_I quit_ he cried, tears flowing again. _I quit before they could fire me, and they were pissed, but I couldn’t take it anymore. I can’t go back to that, not now, not after I know what--know what,_ he trailed off. 

_What you deserve, Taeyong,_ Jaehyun supplied, taking a deep breath of courage. _I love you, Taeyong, so much._

 _I love you too, Jaehyun._

“Jaehyun, my instructor offered me a job, he told me I could start working part time at his restaurant when I’m not in class!” Taeyong sounded so happy, and Jaehyun felt a wide smile spread across his face. He was happy too. 

“That’s amazing, Taeyong, that’s incredible,” he breathed, pulling Taeyong closer. “You’re amazing, I’m so proud of you.” 

After Taeyong quit the club, his income slowly trickled down to zero, leaving him worried. He was spending a lot of time on the computer, reading, and when Jaehyun asked he gave noncommittal answers about what he was doing. A couple weeks went by and Jaehyun didn’t push it. 

Taeyong curled up to Jaehyun’s side one night after they got into bed. He had been staying at Jaehyun’s place for a while now, much to Jaehyun’s pleasure. _Jaehyun, I have to tell you something._

 _I applied for a scholarship, for culinary school. I know, I should have told you this before, but I figured it wouldn’t amount to anything, so I didn’t want to tell anyone and then have to break the news that I didn’t get it._ Jaehyun listened intently, reserving judgement. _But I got it, I got it, and I got into culinary school, I did it Jaehyun._

Jaehyun was reminded of Taeyong’s joy from then in the current moment as well, feeling him exhale in his embrace. At that time, Jaehyun could tell Taeyong was as scared as he was excited. _The thing is, I don’t know if I can keep paying for my place. So I was hoping if I could stay with you for a little while, I’ll get a part time job and pay you, I just need to stay for a little bit-_

 _Oh my god, of course Taeyong, of course you can stay here. For as long as you’ll let me have you around._

“I can start next week, and I’ll get paid, I’m so happy Jaehyunnie,” Taeyong laughed. 

Taeyong moved in shortly after he got the scholarship, and he fit in perfectly with Jaehyun. They already knew how to share the same space, Jaehyun knew how Taeyong liked his eggs on a lazy Saturday morning, and Taeyong knew exactly how to kiss Jaehyun to make him breathless. 

“You’re going to do so well, Taeyong, I know it. I’m so proud of you.” 

“Thank you, Jaehyun,” Taeyong said, grabbing Jaehyun’s collar to kiss him on the mouth. “I love you, so much.” 

Jaehyun shivered at the words against his lips, making his stomach flip just like how it did the first time Taeyong said that to him. He smiled, resting palms on Taeyong’s cheeks. He kissed him again, feeling his warmth, his love, how far he had come. 

“I love you too, Taeyong.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> sorry this shitty chapter took forever lol, i've been to emo to do anything basically
> 
> as always, comments and kudos are greatly appreciated and make my dumbass very happy. if any of you have any requests for fics let me know, i need things to do lol

**Author's Note:**

> comments and kudos always appreciated


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